a childlike faith

Across the room, Alex saw him. Her daddy was up on the stage, holding his bass guitar, getting ready to lead us in worship. Her always bright eyes brightening a little more, she ran across the room and up onto the stage, winding her way between monitors and music stands. Finally, she made it to her daddy. He bent down, scooping her into his arms, hugging her tightly.

What an amazing picture of the gospel! Unburdened by shame, she simply ran to her daddy. She had no sense of decorum, questioning whether her behavior was appropriate. She was not afraid of being on the stage in front of everyone with all eyes on her, she was just excited to be with her dad.

And like our heavenly Father, he did not send her away. He was not looking around the room to see if her behavior was socially appropriate. His eyes were for his little girl, gladness spreading across his face as he bent down to embrace her.

Jesus had a special affection for children. He told his disciples to let them come. I wonder if I got a glimpse of why he felt that way today. Jesus longs for us to run to him, to seek his presence, while he trains his eyes on us and scoops us up into his arms.

Parents and pastors: Why are kids leaving the church?

Why are kids leaving the church?    I am not sure why it struck me so soundly today but this, I think, is one of the most important blog posts I have read in some time.  Kids are leaving the church.  Perhaps we catastrophize a bit and fail to account for those who return to the church, but there is no doubt that kids are leaving.  The author of this article, Top 10 Reasons our Kids Leave Church, has asked why and come up with some good thoughts. I would strongly encourage all of you, if you are involved in the lives of kids--your own or someone else's--to slowly chew on this article and consider its implications.  I have included the list, but please click through for the descriptions.  a few brief snippets, but again, please read it! 

10. The church is relevant.
9. They never attended church to begin with. 
8. They get smart.
7. You sent them out unarmed.
6. You gave them hand-me-downs.
5. Community.
4. They found better feelings. 
3. They got tired of pretending.
2. They know the truth.
1. They don't need it.

The author writes, "Our kids leave because we have failed to deliver to them the faith 'delivered once for all' to the church.  I wish it wasn’t a given, but when I present law and gospel to these kids, the response is the same every time: 'I’ve never heard that.'  I’m not against entertaining our youth, or even jumbotrons, or pizza parties (though I probably am against middle aged guys trying to wear skinny jeans to be “relevant).. it’s just that the one thing, the MAIN thing we’ve been tasked with? We’re failing. We’ve failed God and we’ve failed our kids.  Don’t let another kid walk out the door without being confronted with the full weight of the law, and the full freedom in the gospel."


Zach Nielsen linked to this article on his blog. 

Acuff on the Crying Room

Our church doesn't have a crying room, but I have been places where they do.  Jon Acuff, of Stuff Christians Like fame, has written a real winner about the crying room.  I particularly laughed at #4.

4. You will get a cold in there.
Unless you bust out a hazmat suit and coat yourself with a thick layer of Vick’s VapoRub, you are leaving the crying room with a cold. This is happening. Kids are like little mucus machines. The other night my kids had a nose blowing contest in the bathtub. Let me correct that, a “tissue-less nose blowing contest.” If your kid starts crying in church, you might not know what he’s yelling, but let me translate, “Mom, we’re going in the crying room. I hope you like colds!”

Read the whole thing here.  

They'll Be Watching

My son, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways. -Proverbs 23:26

I have been meditating on this verse all week.  It initially made me uncomfortable.  The writer of this proverb not only is aware that children observe their parents, he is asking that they do. 

I want my children to emulate many of the things about me.  I want them to have a passion for God and His word.  I want them to love family.  I want them to pursue knowledge.  I want them to be committed to church, hard work, and other people.  

But there are things about my character that, honestly, I would hope they manage better than I have.  Sometimes, I am too angry.  Sometimes, I would rather stick my nose in a book than get on the floor and play with my kids.  Sometimes, I willfully give in to sin.  

As I think about my children, it is easy to surmise that I want them always to see the good in me and never the bad.  

In spite of my sin, I hope that my children give me their hearts and let their eyes observe my ways.  I hope they see that a life mired in sin is covered by grace.  I hope they see a faithful life, even in dark places.  I hope they see that following Jesus is not always easy, but in the end it is worth the effort. 

Unfiltered Joy

It has been a frequent occurrence lately that people will ask me how I am doing. I explain that despite barometric emotions, I am largely doing quite well. This prompts the inevitable question, "no, how are you really doing? Are you just putting on a brave face?" to which I answer, honestly, "I really am doing well. God has thus far granted me grace enough to persevere and I pray that it continues."

I admit, though, that today was a trial. Since Saturday evening, Heather has been battling a bacterial infection that has left her nauseous, febrile, and hurting. Because I am a light sleeper and I feel her pain, as she tosses and turns or rushes to the bathroom, I lie there wondering what I can do know that that the answer is "nothing" except to pray. So I pray--for sleep, for comfort, for reprieve, for God's will. So in my fatigued state as I watched my wife wracked by pain, retching, I wondered, "is this what chemo will bring? Are we in for 16 weeks of this? or more?"

Mid-day, Grace spoke with Gen Thul (please check out her wonderful writings here), who invited us for dinner tonight along with the Fugates for a pseudo-small group. Once I felt assured that Heather was comfortable and in the capable hands of her mother, I looked forward with anticipation to the reunion with our dear friends. You see, we had been apart for much too long not just because of Heather's cancer, but also because Gen and Aaron's third daughter, Amelia, was in the hospital for 10 days with encephalitis and only recently returned home.

Grace, Ian, and I arrived first to visit with Aaron for a few minutes followed shortly thereafter by Gen and the kids. Finally, Zack and Sara arrived, nearly completing the reunion as Heather remained home to rest. The excited anticipation was just one of the wonderful feelings I experienced tonight. As our children, who missed each other desperately, fell into their old routines, sounds of excited chatter, laughter, and even happy screaming emerged from upstairs with a greater intensity than we have heard in a long time. I felt their emotions in my own heart as well as I was able to visit and joke with friends whom I cherish dearly.

I think that if Satan wants to attack God's followers, he merely needs to isolate we Christians. We function best in community. I truly feel strength, rejuvenated strength, in fellowshipping with these people. As I watched and listened to our children together, I was struck that they seem to be more than just friends, they are more closely connected than that. In the same way, Heather and I consider these people--Aaron, Gen, Sara, and Zack--more than just members of our Bible study, more than just friends. They are truly our brothers and sisters in Christ and we love them dearly.

John 13:34--"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another."

Parenting on the razor's edge

To know wisdom and instruction, to understand words of insight, to receive instruction in wise dealing, in righteousness, justice, and equity;to give prudence to the simple, knowledge and discretion to the youth--Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance, to understand a proverb and a saying, the words of the wise and their riddles. The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.--Proverbs 1:2-7

Over the past week or so, a confluence of factors has led me to think specifically about how I present Christ to my children. One of those factors was Michael Spencer, the i-monk. I once emailed Mr Spencer and told him that he was the blogger that I hate to love because although I don't always agree with him, he often makes me think deeply about my faith. Over the past few days, he has done a series of posts on young earth creationism, atheism, and abandoning the faith. This post today prompted me to write. Briefly, his essay tells of a young man who walked away from the God of his youth because there was no freedom to think independently or creatively under the umbrella of fundamentalism.

At times, when I read stories like this, I feel absolutely frozen inside. I believe there is no more important decision that my children can make than the decision for Christ, but how do I help them on that journey? Too much inflexibility and legalism can lead to rebellion. Too little guidance and structure can lead to a poorly calibrated moral compass. As I perch precariously along this narrow blade, I fear falling one way or the other, jeopardizing my children's eternal future.

As I think about these issues, I come to a place of wanting to teach my children to think for themselves from a Christian worldview by modeling that very thing in myself. I want them to see me deeply reflecting about issues in the world or in my faith and, through prayerful consideration and scriptural contemplation, coming to what I believe is a Biblical conclusion. When they approach me with questions, I want to provide guidance and wise counsel, but also encourage them to think through the questions for themselves with no hint of judgment in their process. If they arrive at a conclusion that is different from mine, I want to be able to ask myself whether their conclusion jeopardizes their salvation. If it does, I pray God gives me the words as I encourage them to seek Him. If it does not, I pray that I can demonstrate grace and parental pride in their ability to think for themselves.

Above all, I pray that God grants me the wisdom and the courage to teach my children what is truly important--the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Discussions about how the earth was created, whether homosexuality is a sin, or whether Bono is actually a Christian are infinitesimally unimportant relative to the Good News. I also pray for freedom from anxiety about whether I am "doing it right" instead trusting that if God seeks my children, they will be found by Him. I desire for myself and my children to be overwhelmed by the grace of Christ, to love others, and seek God with all of our hearts, souls, minds, and strength.

This may explain some of my patients

Al Mohler talks about Nature Deficit disorder. SEND YOUR KIDS OUTSIDE!!!

HT: Zach Nielsen