Vomit in my hair

Once you get the uncontrolled giggles out of the way regarding my lack of hair, please read on.  

So many of us clean ourselves up for public showing.  We hide who we really are because we are embarrassed, or afraid of being judged by others.  I have done so many things in my life that I am mortified about.  I have sinned deeply against my wife and children, even long after becoming a Christian.  Even in those times when I have tell myself I should have it together, I have been a moral wreck.  I get too angry with my family.  My thoughts and actions have too often been impure. I judge others even when wallowing in my own sinfulness. I try to pull myself up by my bootstraps, only to slip and fall again. 

C. Michael Patton has a great post today, one that in many regards mirrors my recent feelings. Near the beginning, he quotes Chuck Swindoll, "If you really knew me, you would not listen to me. But don’t worry. If I really knew you, I would not let you in this church.” He goes on to talk about this tendency to want to present ourselves favorably, to cover up our messiness.  He discusses a scene from the TV show Breaking Bad when a father, who had cancer, broke down in front of his son apologizing for the way he was the previous night.  He had vomit in his hair.  His son said, "No. I want to remember you exactly the way you were last night. It was the first time you were real."

May we all be like the tax collector in Jesus' story about the Pharisee and the tax collector.  May our cry be "God have mercy on me a sinner" and not "God I thank you that I am not like other men." (Luke 18:10-14).

God forgives those who sin.  He really does.  But first, you need to admit you are a sinner.