As a the father of two biological children, an Ethiopian daughter
and soon to be father of a Haitian daughter and son, the killing of Trayvon
Martin has affected me more deeply than I would have anticipated. I am left with so many questions and few
answers.
- What will I tell my children, when they are old enough to understand, that sometimes people are killed because of the color of their skin?
- How can I explain to them that the way a person dresses, walks or talks sometimes brings hate to the surface?
- How will I reassure them that they are safe when racial tension is so alive and well?
- How do I teach my sons to love others well, stay humble, and have a heart of service?
- How do I instruct my sons to be servant leaders in their homes and churches rather than giving in to what society expects them to be?
- Why will I have to explain to my daughters that there may be some neighborhoods where they are just not safe?
- How will I comfort my son when someone calls him a racial slur for no reason?
- Would it be better for all of us if we lived somewhere else?
- What will I say when they ask, “was I treated that way because I did something wrong?”
- How will I let them know that there are some well-meaning people who want to sweep racial differences under the rug and pretend life is the same for people of all colors, when it just isn’t?
- What will I feel when they want to explore their identities and relationships in much deeper ways independent from us?
- Are we doing the right thing?
Though I am more settled on some of the questions than
others, there are no easy answers. I do believe
that I have been called to be a husband and a father. I believe that God has, so far, entrusted
five children to my care. I don’t know
what the future holds and I am okay with the unknown. God has a habit of not revealing his entire
plan in advance. I continue to learn to trust Him, knowing that
my job is to keep moving forward, living in light of what I do know and leaving
the rest to Him.
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