A gentle reminder of grace

Last night, I took a big step that has been a long time in coming.  I returned to a Weight Watchers meeting after an absence of nearly two years. 

Looking back, when I departed Weight Watchers, I had an air of confidence.  I gathered up my inheritance of books, knowledge, and previous success and ventured away into a far country on my own.  I soon discovered, though, that I had lost my way.  I found myself floundering, longing to be back.  Yet I felt a deep sense of failure.  I came to a point about a week ago when the longing to return eclipsed my pride. 

I walked slowly--hesitantly--to the meeting room.  I muttered to the receptionist that I did not know what to do because I had been gone so long.  She asked my name, a tell-tale sign of how far away I had slipped.  I told her my name and the meeting leader, emerged from a nearby room and said, "I was just talking about you today, about how much you contributed when you were here."  I was a dead man walking, following her to be weighed.  I gingerly stepped on the scale, immediately apologizing, making excuses.  "I know I have gained a lot.  It has been a really hard year."  I suppose in the back of my mind, I expected her to say, "wow! You certainly have gained a lot.  See what happens when you don't come? Are you going to stick around this time or how long before you slip away again?"  Rather than judgment, I received grace.  She reminded me how glad she was to see me back without a hint of disapproval.

As I was waiting for the meeting to start, I began thinking about the story of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32).  God does the same thing for us.  In my sin, I turn away from God.  I venture to a far country to live a life of debauchery.  When I finally remember the life I have in my Father's house, I return humbly.  He does not sit me down to review all of my sins with me asking for repayment, he shows grace (Psalm 103).  He welcomes me back in to His house.  Every time.